"Without putting him on the defensive, tell your child you're concerned about who he's hanging out with and that you're worried he's doing drugs," says Bartell.
Some parents prefer not to let teens have computers in their rooms, since it makes it harder to supervise computer usage, and this is perfectly reasonable.
Many experts also suggest establishing a rule that the computer has to be off at least one hour before bedtime, as a way to ensure that teens get more sleep.
"It's so hard for parents when this happens," says Nadine Kaslow, Ph D, a psychologist specializing in kids and families at Emory University in Atlanta.
"But part of adolescence is about separating and individuating, and many kids need to reject their parents in order to find their own identities." Teens focus on their friends more than on their families, which is normal too.
One solution is the good, old-fashioned approach of: "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." By letting your teenager know that you're here for him no matter what, you make it more likely that he'll let down his guard and confide in you once in a while, which is a rare treat.