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All touching doesn't need to lead to sex, but it is a part of being physically intimate." —Brenda Venus, author of "As a rule, women take longer to get sexually aroused, so start by yourself before you get into bed.

Spend 30 minutes taking a bath with candles and fondling yourself." —Debora Peterson, coauthor with Thom E.

You can also add a little pulsing while twisting." —Lou Paget "Getting your man to masturbate while you're also fondling his penis is a huge turn-on for both you and your man.

Begin by watching a sexy video like (If you don't want to hunt these down at your local video store, order erotic movies through The Sexuality Library at 800-289-8423.) Ask him to act out some of the moves in the movie." —Cricket Richmond "To help him best delight you with his hands, provide lots of coaching and be patient.

Spreading the labia heightens the sensation, and if he's down there using his hands to hold everything open, they can become cramped and stiff pretty quickly — this way his hands are free to pleasure you in other places." —Lou Paget "When you're giving a hand job, try a technique I call Ode to Brian.